Why You Are the Second Lead and NOT the First Lead
This article is more about discussing human nature than discussing drama addiction. Why are you the second lead and not the first? Why didn't you get the girl at the end? Those of you who were the second lead in their own love lives know, that you have no idea what the answer to these questions are. Us humans tend to see things, the way we want to see it...
So here are some of the reasons I listed:
SPOILER ALERT!
This article includes mild spoilers for the following: Delightful Girl, Who Are you, Witch Yoo Hee, Boys Before Flowers, You're Beautiful, Hotaruno Kikari, Love Rain, Cinderella's Sister, Flower Boy Next Door, Beast and the Beauty, Protect the Boss, Kimi ni Todoke, Shining Inheritance, Flower Boy Ramyun Shop, and Playful kiss
1. Plain Jerks..
I am a plain jerk. I steal, blackmail, sell my soul to the devil, but still want this righteous good girl to fall in love with me!
I mean Byun Hak Do (Uhm Tae Woong) in Delightful Girl. Choon Hyang (Ha Chae Young) literally blackmailed her into staying with him and staying away from the guy she loves, while Shim Jae Ha (Jin Yi Han) in Who Are You chose to be good to the girl he loves, but be bad in every other aspect! Including stealing her father’s paintings...
Yoo Joon Ha (Kim Jeong Hoon) from Witch Yoo Hee doesn’t count I guess.. even though he was also a plain Jerk, but he never really cared about getting the girl, for guys like him he’ll only move on to the next.
Exception..
Of course there are some exceptions,mysteriously everybody in Boys Before Flowers, including JanDi (Koo Hye Sun) forgot about what a jerk Jun Pyo (Lee Min Ho) has been!, I mean come on!! He drove a guy to kill himself, bullied whoever he wanted for years, and they never showed that he regretted this life style of his even for once!
2. Reserved and Overly Patient
I’ll wait for the perfect moment… I want her to know me more, and fall in love with me without confessing. I want to confess in a great way, great place, and everything has to be perfect… These kind of excuses saved you a seat in the audience, while the main lead forced his way into her life and her hear Waiting for the right time sometimes means waiting forever…
GREED is the key element here. If you weren't greedy for the one you love, and just kept hesitating and waiting in the shadow, welcome to the second male lead land.
Who was it that first comes to your mind?The two ultimate second leads Kang Shin Woo (Jung Yong Hwa) from You’reBeautiful and Yoon Ji Hoo (Kim Hyun Joong) from Boys Before Flowers
Ji Hoo succeeded in forcing his way once,and almost got “Jan Di”, if it wasn't for his last minute kindness attack that caused him to lose his chance forever -_-‘
Shin Woo was the master of bad timing,waiting for the perfect moment, and therefore lost his chance forever.
Exceptions:
Waiting, I think, is much less dangerous in J-Dorama, because waiting did serve Takano Seiichi (Fujiki Naohito) from Hotaruno Hikari well at the end. He waited patiently from afar for quite some time, and he got the girl in the end.
3. Cowards
Cowards are very much cowards to the extent that you won’t even notice they’re there!
Really passive, very good listeners and really good in giving advice, which will help THE TWO LEADS END UP TOGETHER!!
“Like who” You ask? I can answer that, the best example of my point is Lee Sun Ho (Kim Shi Hoo) from Love Rain, do you even remember his name? Well, I know with Jang Geun Suk as your opponent it is no easy battle, but still… I mean come on! You never even tried to show it once!
Another example is Han Jung Woo from Cinderella's Sister, I mean Taecyeon VS Chun Jung Myung?! It would be a win for the hot Taecyeon, but he becomes a coward and steps down the whole time for the main lead… I mean, didn't they teach you courage in the military?!
Exception:
Where can I find a coward that got the girl? Do you think Ku Dong Geun (Ryu Seung Bum) from the Beast and the Beauty fits? He is the coward, but the heavens favored him, and helped him with the whole blind situation, maybe?
4. Over-caring
She’s a delicate flower, a sweet weak creature that can be broken easily. I wanna protect her and make her troubles less, FROM AS FAR AWAY AS I CAN…
I think this is how it goes: losing yourself in the best interest and needs of the one you love to the point that your very own existence disappears from your world. If you can’t even feel your existence anymore, how do you expect HER to feel it?
Need an example? If you watched Flower Boy Next Door, then I don’t think you need one, because you already seen it all in Oh Jin Rak (Kim Ji Hoon)... His broken heart hurt us all, I have a friend who dropped the drama because she couldn't take watching him losing Go Dok Mi (Park Shin Hye) right before his eyes, but then why did he lose her? Was he not cute enough??? Naaaaaaah, he is super adorable and had it all, except a place in her life, in her mind and in her heart. He had to stomp his existence through all the walls that she had created around her heart, he had to be that strong...
Speaking of strong, if the girl that you had fallen in love with had a strong character, then your existence in her life should be even stronger. You should give advice and support from the sidetracks to keep yourself from adding another problem to her life, BUT... Now you didn't only succeeded in not becoming another problem in her life, but you’re actually nothing in her life AT ALL. Take my advice, if the only place for you in her life is a problem… take it! Work on changing that place from there. Did you hear me? Cha Moo Won (Kim Jae Joong) from Protect the Boss? -_-
Exception:
If all of those who kept a protective distance and supported from afar were as wonderful as Kazehaya Shouta (Miura Haruma) from Kimi ni Todoke, then we wouldn't have a problem here. He kept his distance and supported her until she grew stronger, and then he made his move and got the girl in the end... and I’m sure glad he did <3 ;)
4. "Friend Only" Material
We had been hearing a lot of complains recently about girls friend-zoning guys. OK, sometimes bad guys get our attention, but that’s NOT the only reason.
Do you know that ”moment” that happens when two people look each other in the eyes and fall in love? This “spark” that starts the love fire in your heart? Well, simply, those "friend-only" material guys never have these moments or these sparks with the girl they love, and the reason is NOT the girl, it’s their attitude -_-
OK you’re hot, cute and a super gentleman,but your attitude is still that of a friend. Park Jun Se (Bae Su Bin) from Shining Inheritance is an amazing example for this: while the two main leads had thousands of “moments” even in the silliest situations, he was busy enjoying a bike ride with the girl he loves, talking about the history of the other guy!
Another example of the "friend-only" material guy is “Jeremy” from You're Beautiful. Lee Hong Ki, I love you and you’re amazing but for me, I’ll never blame Go Mi Nam (Park Shin Hye) for not looking at him as MAN...
Exception:
Enrique Geum (Yoon Shi Yoon) from Flower Boy Next Door… He was very much Jeremy-like, did all the cute and friend-like acts but he got the girl at the end. What was it that saved him you ask? It was his forcefulness for sure. He was proactive and forced his way into Ahjumma’s heart <3
6. Distant
No matter how much you may love her, you’re still really distant. Maybe you’re not a talkative guy, or you’re too mature to share your thoughts with the girls that you like, but these are all stupid excuses that results in you being thousands and thousands miles away from the girl you love, even though she’s sitting right beside you…
Choi Kang Hyeok (Lee Ki Woo) from Flower Boy Ramyun Shop, super cute, super cool, super QUIET! Not only did you spent the first episodes sleeping in the back without her noticing you’re even there, you also were so quite to the point that you were nothing more than a sweet smell that would keep her warm and comfortable, but nothing more..
Exception:
Most of the main leads of the dramas I have watched are distant at the beginning, but came around at the end. I guess I can’t find an exception, Baek Seung Jo (Kim Hyun Joong) from Playful Kiss maybe?
Without you realizing it, you may be making one of the six mistakes above with the one you love, so this article may come in handy ;) I hope for everyone to be the main lead in your own love lives ^-^