LBPG:
Absolutely. She may have chosen because the alternative was less attractive (whatever the alternative would've been, she would've accepted it, imo) but truly she really did want to be with him, as she reiterated in her death bed.
I agree that she wanted to be with him as she said, if she didn’t she would have done anything possible to get away. It’s like how she said before, as Court Lady and King, she was close enough to the flame but not in the fire pit. She can see him but isn’t trapped and it was enough even if it meant she couldn’t have him at all. However, she was forced to make her choice when that alternative was not seeing him at all like the year they spent apart because even though she can hide her heart away in his presence, San couldn’t do the same.