"freedom is everybody’s business" -- NOT ME: a love letter to Thai people

Not Me is undoubtedly one of the best Thai series ever made and it's a product of an incredible amount of care. as i said in the title of this review, Not Me is a love letter to the people of Thailand by the producers, the writers, the actors, and everyone else that was involved in the production of this show. it is a poignant love letter to Thailand's queer community, their revolutionaries, the Thai proletariat, and everyone else who is marginalized by the system, written by people who clearly care a lot and want better for their country and their people.

besides having an incredibly well-written, complex, and layered scenario; intentional and complementary sound design; creative, boundary-breaking, and emotional cinematography; this show addresses a lot of important societal issues, such as labor rights for disabled people, class differences, educational opportunities based on class, privileges and social/cultural capital, the idea of law as justice, corruption, nepotism, police brutality, workers' rights, the “right” ways of the revolution, the luxury to protest, and many more. this show is very unapologetically anti-capitalist AND very unapologetically queer; what better way to communicate its messages than through one of Thailand’s most influential soft powers? a BL.

one thing that particularly impressed me was how the show did not hold back at all; as much as they were unapologetically anti-capitalist and pro-revolution, they were not afraid to explore the gray zones and they were not worried about getting everything "right." the variation in different characters' different approaches to the "revolution," or radicalism in general, the ambiguities in their ideologies, the different ways they all approached the cause based on their lived experiences; it all added so much nuance to the show and showed how the writers/producers took their audience seriously and wanted us to grapple with these ideas.

the quote i added in the title is from Dolemite (1975) and the context is Black people's liberation; it says, "revolution was never meant to be easy [...] it's not a matter of color. freedom is everybody's business." i added this in because while Not Me takes place in Thailand, the issues addressed are universal and freedom is everybody's business, which includes yours and mine. since solidarity was also one of the points the show emphasized as being very important for any sort of societal change, i believe it is worthwhile to make a point out of this.

furthermore, i loved how the gang were portrayed as frequent readers who constantly engaged with radical material. i loved how the characters participated in discourse, as in there was actual dialogue written for different characters going back and forth, about the issues addressed by the show. i particularly loved Nuch's input & their discussions with Gram. i loved how all of these characters approached the fight in creative and unique ways. there were expressionist dancers, expressionist artists, readers, those who fought by protesting, those who made signs for protests, those who organized on social media; there was space for all.

ACTING -- as strong as the scenario of this show is, the acting performances of the whole cast need just as much praise. starting with Gun, who had the hardest job of all yet delivered phenomenally, his acting is never really over the top but always nuanced and intentional. the way he played White, the way he played Black, the way he played the White that was pretending to be Black, and the way he played the Black that was pretending to be White, were all different and easily identifiable just by his gaze. it was almost like the look on his face reflected the lived experiences of the character he was playing; his gaze was cold, controlled, and firm when he was Black, whereas he looked inexperienced but passionate, innocent but not dumb, and filled with so much hope when he played White. Not Me also had Off's best acting. i never thought Off gave any particular outstanding performances in his previous work that i've seen or i've never seen an OffGun show and said, "yeah, Gun is great but look at Off's performance," until i watched him in Not Me. Off's performance in Not Me very much stands out and is proof that a good script and director can bring out very different skills in an actor. he did a great job at portraying Sean's grievances, his pain, his anger, and his shortcomings. additionally, i thought OffGun had so much more chemistry in this show than their other shows together, which also shows chemistry can be cultivated through writing & directing and it is not static between two people. lastly, First also gave one of his best performances in Not Me. he was doing a lot of eye-acting and i particularly loved how he interpreted Yok's disappointment when he found out he had been betrayed.

POLICE BRUTALITY -- at first, i thought it was weird that they wrote Yok's love interest as a cop, who are agents of the state, tasked with stopping revolutionary efforts all around the world by any means necessary. however, this was one of the gray zones they explored, which did, in fact, serve a narrative purpose. Dan represented the people who understood what was wrong with society but fell victim to the idea that they can change things through becoming a part of the system. he became a cop and the very same system he thought he would be able to change by doing this made him complicit. he was given authority and power over the people simply by becoming a cop and he was given a deadly weapon, as well as the authority to shoot whenever he felt "threatened." eventually, he ended up becoming a well-working part of the system and reinforcing the same conditions he hoped to change through becoming a cop.

despite appreciating Not Me addressing how systems of oppression cannot be changed from the inside, i thought the show really dropped the ball when it comes to Dan and his police brutality storyline, especially considering the global political climate at the time this show came out, as well as them mentioning the Black Lives Matter protests. despite the heavy, heavy guilt Dan felt, which Gawin beautifully portrayed, i found it very hard to feel sympathy towards him after he revealed how he "accidentally" killed a presumed-to-be-guilty yet unarmed person (not that it matters) who was running away and faced no consequences other than his conscience. he detailed how he did this, how his coworkers covered it up, how he felt so guilty that he changed stations, yet he never quit his job (until later). yet, he never found the family of the man he unlawfully killed and apologized. he left Sean without a father, took someone's partner from them, while exercising (abusing) his state-appointed power. he saw Sean seeking justice years ago yet he only went to him when he couldn't carry the guilt anymore. even worse, when confronting Sean, Dan says it was an accident, which shows that he still doesn't get it. this is how the system operates. he would not be in that position at all, with a gun in his hand and the power to direct it at someone, if he hadn't chosen to become a cop and a part of this system. he said it was an accident but he never really took responsibility. he killed a man but he never was judged by the law.

furthermore, i was really disappointed with Yok's reaction to finding out what Dan did, especially because he knew Dan for so little yet was friends with Sean for years and saw how traumatized and radicalized he was by his father's death. i felt like he really didn't feel the weight of what he did beyond how it made Dan feel. it was sort of this romantic, opening-up moment, which felt odd to me. i felt like all the things Yok said were wrong and lacked empathy for Sean; he said Dan was now making amends by fighting against Tawi when he never even took responsibility for what he did or even apologized so how could he be making amends? on whose terms? to who exactly? in what ways? i really didn't think he deserved to be comforted, especially by Sean's very own friend.

while watching the show, i said, "unless Sean kills Dan and takes his revenge or is able to get him charged with murder, i won’t think they handled that storyline fairly and it will just be (some cops are good but they make mistakes) copaganda to me," but the actual confrontation between Sean and Dan was so much worse because they made Sean look unreasonable for wanting revenge and it felt like he was forced into resolving this issue within himself for the comfort of everyone else. Yok was yelling at Sean, saying "he's trying his best to make it up to you" for, literally, killing his father through state-legitimized violence. on top of the fact that they kept referring to him making amends, which somehow did not involve the actual victims at all, i just felt crazy watching this particular scene. everything Gram said was even worse. he said, "don't take revenge, what are the laws for?" yet the laws clearly didn't do anything? in fact, the laws were in place to protect and empower those like Dan who protect and serve the state. if the law was there to provide justice to citizens, would Dan get away with killing someone just because he was wearing a badge? Gram said to punish the ones who really did wrong, which, he is right, because police killings are political and directly related to structural oppression and this is not a problem of individual shortcomings of one cop. yet, no form of "justice" was served for Sean and his family and Sean didn't deserve to be made to feel like his feelings weren't valid, no matter how impulsive. of course, i didn't actually want him to kill Dan and get himself in that predicament with the law, cause unlike Dan, he would be charged, but he wasn't wrong to want revenge.

NON-VIOLENCE -- one other area where i thought the show dropped the ball was their focus on non-violence in the context of the revolution, or simply, as it relates to societal change. it reminded me of all the people who were more worried about the looting of luxury stores, damage to property, or respectability politics during the 2020 Black Lives Matter protests, than the people who have been victimized by the police state for far too long, when we know all revolutions in the past have been won through using violence back. in Blood In My Eye, George Jackson says, "revolution builds in stages; it isn't cool or romantic; it's bold and vicious [...] the power of the people lies in its greater potential violence."

Not Me, in many ways, addressed how the law itself is not justice nor is it always just or correct. they acknowledged it is there for a reason but also showed the characters struggle with its limitations. they even openly said how the law exonerates the elite who use it for corruption because it’s made by them and for them. we often saw White question this; he said, “fair competitions only result from fair rules. what if the rules aren’t fair? is it right to break them?”

while they did address both sides of this spectrum, there was a focus on non-violence, especially portrayed by the main character White, who seemed to be in the middle of everything yet saw and acknowledged both sides. this focus on non-violence, which goes against the radical nature of the show, was disappointing but kind of expected. i was surprised at how honest and fearless the show was in addressing certain political and social themes that i thought they would not fall victim to the liberal notion of non-violence in the context of the revolution. also, them mentioning Martin Luther King Jr in the context of nonviolence was very on point because anytime someone wants to criticize revolutionary efforts, which, of course, can involve violence, they will quote MLK and how he advocated for non-violent protests. Not Me does the same and it's not surprising why they don't bring up other Black revolutionaries, like Kwame Ture, who said, "in order for nonviolence to work, your opponent must have a conscience." furthermore, MLK is always remembered by his most famous sayings about non-violence, yet his other words, such as, "one has a moral responsibility to disobey unjust laws," go unmentioned.

it felt like maybe they intended to focus on unity and the positives to give people hope and make the idea of the revolution more palatable (then again it is a tv show), but diluting revolutionary efforts through notions of non-violence or more palatable and comfortable ways of revolting excuses the violence suffered by the people. both in Sean's case and in general, i think the expectation to stay calm through abuse is where the violence lies. it is almost offensive to ask people to contain their anger, to act respectable, to not use force, when state-sanctioned violence is normalized and millions live in poverty.

WHITE'S PRIVILEGE -- finally, i want to address White as the main character. i mentioned the show focusing on nonviolence before, and this focus is mainly established through White's character. before White took Black's place in the gang, they were already using different forms of violence to fight back.

when White first comes in, we see him as this rich, privileged, sheltered guy, and when he joins the first mission, he’s obviously dumbfounded. in a way, White represents the elite in juxtaposition to the rest of the gang, he doesn't have the same life experiences, he hasn't been burned by the system the way they have been because he's been on the other side, and he has little to no lived experiences with any forms of oppression. yet, he leads the conversations. he represents neutrality, intelligence, and logic while those like Sean or Black, who are rightfully angry, are portrayed as rabid dogs who lack civility and only know violence. White represents the elite's understanding of conflict and revolution and i don't like how him being the main character made it so that his point of view, one of neutrality, was emphasized.

however, this was also White's journey of understanding his privileges and his own position on this chess board, he said, “ [...] if the privileges i’ve had in my entire life come from exploiting others..” which very directly addresses capitalism and wealth inequality. the fact that White had an easy life where he did not have to think or act about the structural problems of society and systems of oppression is because he had the privilege not to. in the end, the show made it seem like it was White, who did not live in Thailand until recently, had no direct experiences with poverty, oppression, or state violence, and lived an overall privileged life, who would bring reason to the group and their actions against those like Tawi. in a way, it was White's neutrality and "logic" that diluted the revolutionary efforts of the gang, which were much more strong and radical when Black was leading them. the show made it seem like these guys, like Sean, who were radicalized through their direct experiences with injustice, were akin to savages acting on pure rage.

i'm emphasizing this point because it was so painfully obvious; even when they found out about the cop's betrayal, White was the one who could see both sides of it. while others were mad or disappointed, White, once again, represented reason and could immediately sympathize with Dan and did not seem to be as emotional about their efforts being ruined. however, what the show doesn't directly tell us is that White can afford to be neutral about this BECAUSE he is privileged. even his capacity for sympathy towards Dan demonstrates how privileged he actually is. he isn't as angry as others because he can afford to be. he hasn't been hurt and damaged by the system the way others have been. he doesn't have the same grievances despite believing in the same cause. yet, he was made to be the voice of reason, which everyone followed. he got to criticize, direct, and change the ways the gang went about the revolution and we were just supposed to believe he somehow knew better and was better, which seemed condescending. for example, when in EP6, White did not follow Sean's plan and assumed he knew better, it showed us that he did not value the experiences of the people who were actual victims of oppression, unlike him who only learned or read about these things. it seemed like the show created scenarios that made the gang look impulsive and thoughtless while White was always written to be the voice of reason and intelligence. as Attica Locke wrote, “you didn’t make good choices, you had good choices,” and that's how privilege operates.

IN CONCLUSION -- no matter my stance on some of the focus points of the show, i loved how they addressed the gray zones in a lot of the issues in the plot. they never claimed to be right or know everything about everything. they tried to acknowledge and explore as many viewpoints as possible, which made for a very enjoyable and educational watch.

most importantly, my favorite part of the show was how they made so much space for love throughout it all. we need so much of it. we need love for each other because that's how we build community. societal change can't come about if people don't care about each other. we need people like White to care about people like Sean. we need people to care when there is nothing in it for them. we need them to care even when it doesn't serve them. this is why i love how they didn't end the show with some unrealistic portrayal of a successful revolt or something. they ended it by emphasizing the most important point: solidarity, solidarity, solidarity. they ended with, "not me, not you, but everyone," emphasizing the importance of the collective over the individual.

and the fight continues.

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strong start, later has poor writing. too complex for its own good. uses aesthetics as an illusion.

i do agree that F4 Thailand is the best retelling of Boys Over Flowers, however, i think it starts off much stronger and it performs poorly towards the end. i recently did a rewatch of the series and i think Thyme (and Bright) remains the best part of it. i also remember how exhilarating the show felt in the beginning with the F4 drama and while it was focused on the development of Thyme and the relationship of Gorya & Thyme. i think if they focused more on that story instead of the politics that took over towards the end, this would've been a really great show.

it's just not going to do it for the viewers when you keep breaking up the main couple because of miscommunication or when they're "doing it for each other." i did love the moments where they were actually happy together though. it's just that the decline in the quality of the storytelling towards the end is hard to ignore. it felt like they made things too complex with not much time to solve them properly.

now, in Boys Over Flowers fashion, this is an incredibly dramatic show that looks very high-quality and has a lot of pretty people in it. but i felt like the drama part of the events was often blown out of proportion while the resolutions did not seem to match the drama at all. i also didn't like how, sometimes, the show would focus on one topic throughout the whole episode while not developing anything else. this is important to point out since there is only 16 episodes.

i also think that this show is actually unexpectedly quite heavy and has low rewatch value because of it. as in, there were just a lot of times i wanted to drop it despite loving it and being invested in the characters. some plot points were just too stupid or repetitive for me to enthusiastically continue the show. as i said, i think the show would've been much better if they kept the school context instead of moving on to the real-world drama.

nevertheless, this is still a good show that i like watching despite finding it heavy and too dramatic. Other than the 'obvious' villains, i found all the characters to be very likable, especially the F4 members. i thought Kavin and Kaning's storyline was cute but i didn't really find Kavin's fall for Kaning that believable. this isn't because his actions didn't show affection because they did and i could see them falling in love in real-time, but i don't think they did well showing the actual change in Kavin's character in terms of his relationship with women and his 'playboy' attitudes.

when it comes to Thyme, who will always remain one of my favorite characters in any TV show ever, i can say that i loved him throughout the show. it's also weird because he's very volatile, impulsive, grumpy, and child-like lol. i don't know. it's something about the combination of Bright and his acting and Thyme. we have many "doesn't know how to love" type of characters but i think Thyme is the epitome of that trope. often times i felt like he just didn't know what to do with what he was feeling because he never had to know and he is very spoiled so he probably never wanted anything for as long as he wanted Gorya. you could especially feel this whenever Thyme was acting out.

finally, yes, this is a good show and yes, it deserves all the hype but the decline in quality and story towards the end really made me rethink the whole show, especially after a rewatch. if i had to rate the show on my first watch, i'd probably give it a 9/10 or something. but a rewatch made me realize that it is overall not that good and the pretty actors, as well as the high-quality feel of the show, actually just act as an illusion.

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amazing show w/ organic development of a strong friendship (to lovers) BUT with lazy & rushed ending

let's start with the tropes: #friendstolovers #slowburn #inlovewithotherpeople #themvstheworld #bickeringcouple #soulmates #eatingdisorder

this is probably the best youth show to come out this year. it is the most realistic and well-done representation of two people becoming best friends in the most organic way possible. you don't see this a lot, but this show really gives you true friendship without there ever being any romance involved at all (at first). the show has a really interesting narrative structure. it's such a unique experience to watch two people become acquainted, become close friends, and gradually care for & fall for each other in what almost feels like real time. the feelings that are portrayed appear more genuine as a result. i just felt like Kang Jia Wei and Xu Jing Jing's relationship was so sincere and innocent, that their connection was so strong and unbreakable, that they could overcome anything.

some plot lines did bore me, especially around the middle of the show. i didn't like that Kang Jia Wei realized his feelings for Xu Jing Jing way before she did so he kinda had to hang around her and Gao Zhan like a third wheel. those few episodes were tough to get through cause it sometimes felt like she didn't care about him or that their relationship had changed in nature. there were also a lot of times the show wasted screen time with irrelevant and quite boring plotlines regarding the side characters. seeing as the ending was rushed and lazy, i can't not think that those scenes were wasted.

i love Chinese dramas because they are often long and involve slow-burn relationships. if you like watching a relationship's development more than watching two people quickly become a couple and have intimate scenes every second, this show is for you. it's also important to mention that this is a Chinese high-school drama so the main couple doesn't really have skinship or intimate scenes like that. in fact, they only hugged like 2 times and there was one kiss at the very end of the show. but the development is so worth it.

in the end, i loved this show and i binge-watched it in like 3 days so clearly, i wasn't bored or turned off at any moment. however, the ending didn't do this show justice and damn near ruined a great show. i just wish that drama writers can get a grip and not be scared to actually resolve problems in their writing instead of using time jumps as a bandaid and hoping that will confuse things enough to justify whatever ending they choose to portray.

also very important is the fact that the main leads had insane chemistry. the kind i haven't seen in a long time. the scenes where they were bickering, reconciling, fighting, or being playful were all executed so well because the actors simply had great chemistry (and they are good actors obviously). they did it all. props to Zhai Zi Lu & Dai Lu Wa.

THE REST OF THIS REVIEW IS JUST MY RANT RE: THE ENDING -- don't read if you don't want spoilers

--

the ending was lazy and rushed. i loved this show and the slow progression of the relationship between the main couple but they spent 29 episodes focusing on irrelevant plot points re: the side characters. Kang Jia Wei had the right to be mad at Xu Jing Jing for keeping his dad’s illness from him. he was really hurtful but i understood his perspective. i get that he just couldn’t face her for a while without thinking about what happened. but for how long? certainly not 4 years.

he fully abandons her, leaves the country, returns her gifts, returns his memories, half-ass apologizes in a letter, saying he doesn’t have the courage to face her even though he understands where she was coming from now and that he probably would have done the same thing for her. he leaves behind Xu Jing Jing, who is paying such a huge price for doing something she was basically forced to do. she loses her best friend before university exams. she still blames herself after 4 years because things never got settled. she still hasn’t moved on. she’s still waking up from dreams where he comes back to her. she still lives thinking that the perception of her is permanently altered in the mind of her best friend and that she will never live down the mistake of keeping the word she gave to a dying man. and then, what do they do?

Kang Jia Wei decides to come back to China on his own time. decides that things should go back to normal now. decides that it would be perfectly appropriate for him to face his former best friend who he abandoned, blocked, and never contacted for 4 years. i just can’t accept the fact that he blocked her lmao. you were so mad at her that you blocked her from communicating with you, not caring she might’ve been in need, or hurt, or just missing you? he didn’t just let her go, he also prevented her from being able to rely on his presence.

the ending is just so rushed and stupid that it pisses me off because this was such a great show. you can’t tell me i watched these two people become best friends in the most organic way i have ever seen on TV for them to do this shit at the end.
it’s annoying that with the way they ended it, we’re supposed to watch Kang Jia Wei have the audacity to come back, and pretend like he can be jealous of Xu Jing Jing, like he gets to care about her after not saying a word for 4 years. it’s just disingenuous and unlike him. i don't know. then he says, we can’t change the past but what do we do about the present? well, it’s not that simple. and his lame ass excuse doesn’t fix anything. i just think these two had such a strong bond that neither party would ever let this happen. i hate it when endings suck.

i thought the very ending scene was meaningful. it felt like they were given the chance to go back in time and fix their mistakes and give themselves a happy ending. but the thing is, it’s not real. they didn’t really fix anything. it’s just a bandaid. finally, i want to say that it was very disappointing that we never got to see them as a couple, doing couple things, & being in love. still, i’m happy to have watched their friendship blossom despite the underwhelming ending. it was just too stupid to accept as a “meh” ending.

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interesting and engaging throughout, straightforward and heartfelt with no draggy storylines

i enjoyed this show beyond words. it's not every day that you watch a show without ever getting bored or disappointed until the end. most of the time, dramas start out strong but go down in quality and writing towards the end. not this show. there are a lot of things i loved about Fight For My Way. it's so honest, straightforward, simple, and heartfelt. it's not gimmicky, tropey, or draggy at all. there are no dumb misunderstanding storylines. it provided me with a certain kind of comfort that i didn't know i even needed. the portrayal of a group of people in their late 20s who have not achieved practically anything that they had dreamed of as kids, who were in jobs they did not necessarily like or enjoy, who weren't anything or anyone was oddly comforting. and this wasn't necessarily a story of them finally achieving their dreams and i think that's what made it so special. this was more of a story of their dreams taking different forms to fit the person they were now. also, you are still young and are allowed to figure things out at 30 years old and i love this show for reminding me of that. it truly dissuaded my aging anxiety for a while.

even though there is a friend group in the show, i was surprised to see how little they actually focused on the friendship aspect since i thought this was going to be one of those youth dramas with the found family trope. this trope describes the relationship of the friend group in this show as well but it is more realistically portrayed and not at all the focus. i would say that this show is more about friendship in romantic relationships as well as just romantic relationships and how they fit into life.

i think i can confidently say that Dong Man is my favorite Park Seo Joon character ever and his pairing with Kim Ji Won is my favorite pairing of his. they had great chemistry, accompanied by great acting, which just made this show even more excellent. i just loved Dong Man and Ae Ra's relationship. i loved their honesty and bluntness. i loved the way they constantly verbalized their feelings for each other. i loved how they easily confessed and expressed their feelings.

i particularly enjoyed the development of the main couple's relationship. it was slow but full of moments, dialogue, and skinship. it was honest and straightforward. it wasn't cringy or timid. i loved how the little things between them were magnified because they've been platonic for 20 years. for example, when they were randomly noticing the attractive features of each other and were confused by their newly-found perspective, it was too cute. also, their skinship moments in the earlier episodes, when they were nowhere near being a couple, were so organic and well done. it was so funny when Ae Ra told Dong Man to not respect her too much because he was being slow to make a move lol. and i liked how even when other people interfered with the main couple's scenes, it really wasn't common. like, the exes had sparse scenes and they really couldn't hurt the main couple. they just provided a healthy amount of jealousy and angst.

overall, they were really everything. even their break-up towards the end is like a non-break-up. they were still them. i'd argue that they were even closer (lol) since they were staying together. they still cared the most about each other. it also matters that they only 'broke up' because Ae Ra was afraid of Dong Man getting hurt and her not being able to handle it. also, since we are on topic, i would like to make a note of how impressed i was by how deeply and tender Ae Ra loved Dong Man. she loved him and took care of him for 23 years. she loved him when he was with other people. she loved him when she was with other people. i felt so bad when they showed us a montage of Ae Ra watching Dong Man kiss Hye Ran again and again over the years while she instinctively turns away. so, through the pain, heartbreak, and fake laughs, she really loved him so deeply.

when it comes to the second couple, i liked the characters individually and i liked that they were showing us a 6-year relationship and the different issues that could come with that as opposed to the main couple. i felt so bad for Seol Hee re: the cheating storyline. even though sometimes it may happen unintentionally, getting emotionally involved with someone else IS cheating your partner. it’s the advances you don’t stop. it’s the remarks you ignore instead of rejecting. and all that leading to something preventable that hurts your partner irrevocably changes the nature of your relationship. Joo Man might not have kissed or had any skinship with his coworker, but as Ae Ra mentioned, cheating doesn't only constitute skinship. he cheated because he lied. he never set boundaries with Ye Jin. they couldn't tell people they were dating but there are a million other ways to set boundaries with someone and he just never did. he just awkwardly accepted her advances and even grew fond of and worried about her. i was so upset when Seol Hee first found out about his lies and involvement with Ye Jin but the first thing she thought to do was not to confront him but go to Ye Jin and ask her not to 'waver' him, which was just so lame and embarrassing. if his heart wavers when he is already in a relationship with you, he was never yours and he is not good to you. the truth is, he never acted like he was afraid to lose her. he was likely too used to her presence that she felt dependable. at that point, i thought they needed to break up but it actually took Seol Hee witnessing him leaving Ye Jin's apartment after a night of not answering calls.

i was happy when they actually broke up even though i knew they'd make them get together again. i also didn't think that Joo Man was actually a good person. even disregarding his lies and sneaky behavior, he was manipulative and believed he was deserving of forgiveness after what he did with no real effort to address what happened and repair what was broken. when Seol Hee stood up for herself for the first time ever, Joo Man said, "why are you being so mean?" and "this isn't like you," which all show that he didn't expect to face consequences for his actions and had the nerve to say ANYTHING about how Seol Hee was reacting to his mistreatment of her.

nevertheless, i liked that they kept them separate for a good while during which Seol Hee was independent and more successful than ever while Joo Man was miserable. i also liked Seol Hee's overall story of not wanting to do anything for the world, succeeding in anything, or adhering to feminist ideals regarding how a woman should live. she just wanted to be happy and at home with her family, which was fine but she was submissive and accepted mistreatment for a good while before she actually stood up for herself.

finally, there were a few things that i didn't necessarily like in the show (but they weren't important and/or didn't bother me too much in the grand scheme of things):

1) Ae Ra getting cheated on is played for jokes. this happens in a lot of kdramas (for example, So I Married an Anti-Fan) where they make a joke out of the main female lead getting cheated on as if cheating isn’t such a huge moral failing, as well as one of the worst and most hurtful things you can do to your partner. i didn't mind it too much because it was clearly setting up the story in the beginning but it did give me a scare as to what the rest of the show was going to look like (as in, if they would make a joke out of other serious topics).

2) some characters don't deserve redemption. i found Hye Ran so repulsive and disgraceful that i was personally offended when they tried to give her 'sort of' a redemption arc at the end. she was awful throughout the whole thing and i could not care about her money problems and her pride getting hurt not even a little bit. her kind of evil was so sinister. she took advantage of Dong Man's naivete and love for her so many times. imagine manipulating a person like that FOR YEARS. she would be with other people and do whatever and go back to Dong Man whenever she wanted, manipulate him using her tears and his soft spot for someone he loves, and get back with him just to dump him whenever she wants again. that is an awful, awful person that did not deserve even the idea of a redemption arc. they could put her in any situation at the end and i still would not feel sympathy for her and i don't think Ae Ra realistically would as well, she just wasn't petty.

3) Dong Man's issues went unexplored. i think the relationship they showcased between Dong Man and Hye Ran was incredibly manipulative and indicative of some sort of attachment issues in Dong Man that i wish were explored further. they did have a 'closure' sort of scene with this couple but they never really explored why Dong Man would be so weak-willed and insecure with Hye Ran and accept her whenever she decided to be with him again. was he desperate for connection? did he just love her too much? did he have abandonment issues? why would he take that kind of abuse?

overall, i loved this show and it's easily one of my favorite shows ever. more little things to comment on:

1) this is a small point (but big for me) but i love it when shows show continuity with the way they handle the scars on a character. like, every time Dong Man got injured, we saw the scar fade naturally over time and over a few episodes. the scars didn't just vanish.

2) like a lot of kdramas, this show had an anti-capitalism plotline. i loved how they explored Ae Ra's career issues and the unfair nature of the standards in the industry she was trying to get into. i remember that one recruiter told her that she had to "prove" her passion through her achievements, which all just require money to put on your CV. if your job criteria involves things that can only be acquired by money and/or being wealthy, then you are purposefully leaving poor people out.

3) i loved the landlord lady because at first, she was that quirky character many kdramas have that secretly helps out and roots for the main characters. when it was revealed that she was Ae Ra's mom, that was expected but i thought it was unnecessary to try to confuse the viewers by showing flashbacks of her with Dong Man and everything since this isn't a mystery drama and those scenes didn't really add anything to the story, you know? other than that, her actual story was really sad. imagine spending your whole life without a mother and being heartbroken about it just because of societal norms. i loved how Ae Ra actually watched the movie that caused all this and she was like, "you were great in it!" lol. i was just happy that they didn't make things too dramatic or angsty.

they deserved their 10s!!

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weak story with not much payoff. good for casual viewing.

i thought that this show was very empty with a weak story. i initially watched it for Jang Ki Young and Hyeri, as well as the cohabitation trope, but there wasn't much angst between them. i mean, i expected there to be more so that might be on me. also, they fell in love pretty quickly, especially the female lead, which doesn't do much for the development of their relationship.

but overall, the story was just uninteresting and the show felt hollow and surface-level. also, their first kiss was so weird that it made me want to turn off the show? lol. i get the reasoning behind it but i thought that it was just uncomfortable. i feel like they should've shown that the ML was having a hard time being intimate with the FL for [redacted] reasons in another intimate kissing scene and not during their first kiss. i don't know, i feel like it kinda ruined it.

but either way, it can be watched as a head-empty drama when you don't feel like doing too much thinking. plus, both Jang Ki Young and Hyeri are very hot in this show so, you know, it's worth it.

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less intense than the usual Lakorn, the FL can't act but overall good chemistry and compelling story

this was one of the less intense and dramatic Lakorns i have ever watched, yet, of course, it was still plenty dramatic. i really enjoyed the determination of the main male lead and i loved the actor's performance. however, i cannot say the same thing for the main female lead. it just seemed like her face was often expressionless. she looked pretty when she cried but there was barely any emotion in her scenes, which lessened the impact of the couple's scenes. i also wished the main couple had more scenes together in the beginning that lasted longer and amounted to more than staring at each other.

other than that, i found the main female lead's character very frustrating because she never spoke up or fought back. i get the filial piety aspect of her behavior but it just made her look suppressed and weak. she was also always fainting, crying, and in danger, which just gets boring, you know. nevertheless, the main leads had great chemistry.

the story was compelling but sometimes it was progressing so slowly. also, the resolution didn't make much sense. i don't know, i feel like the main lead's story doesn't really justify a lot of his actions. especially his hatred for and jealousy of his step-sister who was like 5 when she was adopted and surely didn't know what the hell was going on.. it was a bit much and unreasonable.

like many other Lakorns, this drama was poorly-made and had a low budget, had a goof main storyline that wasn't executed very well, was full of plot holes, etc., etc... but i did still enjoy it. just wished the main female lead had more self-respect.

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flawed yet utterly enjoyable, uses narrative manipulation, explores the dichotomy of revenge/justice

i watched Revenge of Others weekly and one thing that cannot be denied about it is that it was incredibly enjoyable. the fast-paced episodes, the interesting characters, and the complex layers of mystery kept me waiting for the next episode. this show, in its essence, is an interesting exploration of the bullying culture that exists in South Korea that also tackled the themes of violence, justice, retribution, and revenge.

i will address 5 main points:

1) COMPLEXITY -- this show was a mystery/thriller so it is expected that there will be a lot of misdirecting and new pieces of information being revealed with each episode to build up the suspense. however, i think the show was too complex for its own good. everything seemed to be connected and it seemed like they willfully kept things complex and unresolved to keep the viewers guessing but even when we were at the halfway mark, nothing was revealed yet. by that i mean, there was no subplot resolution until the very end. on top of nothing being resolved, they kept introducing new plotlines and new characters to increase the complexity of the overall plot and add to the mystery. i was afraid they would leave the resolution of everything to the very end and of course, that was the case.

overall, the way they introduced information was (intentionally) disconnected, especially the flashbacks. the timeline of the flashbacks was very confusing. i knew they would end up leaving the resolution of everything to the very end but it’s still annoying how they have over-complicated things throughout the whole show just to add to the mystery. all the little clues that were given to the viewers to keep us guessing and all the theories didn’t matter in the end. i generally liked how they have misdirected the viewers at least a couple of times regarding who the murderer might be but there were just way too many variables and characters and storylines going on for there to be any actual thrill in trying to guess things about the plot. because it didn't matter and the clues that were given were only there to confuse us further and none of them actually led to anywhere. you just had to watch it and accept what the show gives you.

2) LOGICAL FALLACIES -- despite the overcomplexity i talked about above, i actually liked how detailed the main story of this show was. however, the main story and the characters' actions were full of logical fallacies that you would not even realize are there if you didn't actually question their actions. i went into detail about a lot of these in the reaction thread i did for this show on Twitter, but one of the main logical fallacies was how Chanmi was incredibly gullible at times while being smart and reserved at other times. Sejin's whole story where he painted Sooheon as the culprit was full of holes yet Chanmi attempted to shoot Sooheon based solely on his witness account and some circumstantial evidence despite being emotionally involved with him. then only a few episodes later, the same thing happens again. Osung, who they know to be a cunning liar and manipulator, said Wonseok was the one who pushed Jaebum and Chanmi didn't even question it when her not questioning witness accounts almost led her to kill someone innocent who she cares about. her carelessness and naivete were inconsistent. she was distrusting at times yet she also believed things very easily at other times. this just seemed to be a thing where whenever it was convenient for the plot for her to believe what she heard, she did. overall, i think the logical fallacies were caused by the overcomplexity of the plot. if you're giving the story THAT many details, you're going to have some plot holes.

3) BULLYING CULTURE -- clearly, the deeply complex culture of bullying was one of the main themes of this show. they showed the extent of the bullying that exists in schools, its intensity, and how far the students actually observed the silent "rules" that came with this interwoven culture. one thing i found interesting was how the show portrayed the "bystanders." when Junggyeong, the rapist, was at school bullying the victim or any other student, he was never confronted by anyone or more specifically, he wasn't confronted all the time. yet, when he had to leave the school, all the students were cheering out the windows, acknowledging his bad actions and expressing their thoughts on how he deserved what happened to him. i thought that was interesting because bullies almost always require bystanders who do nothing seeing as they will bully people in public to showcase their power. if enough students were to stand up when they saw Junggyeong bully others, he or the other bullies wouldn’t be so confident in their assumed power the next time. another parallel to this scene was when Osung was live streaming a fight between two students and the whole school joined the live and watched two people very violently fight each other. this scene provided us with another look into the workings of the bullying culture that the kids at this school were clearly so accustomed to. they saw violence taking place yet all they did was watch and react as if it was not actually happening in real life and people were not actually getting hurt.

i think what happened in the finale shows that the two instances of irony regarding the bystander students were very much intentionally included the way they were in the show. in the end, just when we thought everything was over, Osung dies while Sooheon tries to defend himself from him and we see that none of the students tell on him to the police because they all thought Osung deserved to die. so, suddenly, they didn't look at the case as a murder, even though an 18-year-old kid died in front of their eyes. they looked at it as retribution/justice/revenge. this way, we see that the students, the bystanders, yield the power to change the course of police investigations. i can’t help but think that this is another reference to the bullying culture at school and it is once again showing that the bystanders have all the power.

4) APPROACH TO VIOLENCE -- i thought this show had an interesting approach to school violence. one that i personally would not expect to see. this show explored the dichotomy of justice/revenge, and other themes of intent, responsibility, and retribution. what was interesting is they explored these topics through the perspective of the bullies, as well as the victims. for instance, you had Chanmi who did not want to rely on the cops to bring justice to her brother (they were useless anyways). she wanted to straight up kill the person who murdered Wonseok. then, you had the trio of Soyeon, Ojung, and Sooheon who were taking matters into their own hands and creating their own justice by punishing the bullies, or more like the criminals, who had severely hurt people in irrevocable ways. this means they believed in violent retribution. they believed in speaking the bullies' language. they believed in dominating them through their own weapons of violence. just like Chanmi. but of course, the incompetency of the police and the politicized and unjust nature of "justice" in South Korea (they even criticized certain policies re: the punishment of minors, etc.) played into their approach to things.

but we also saw a different side of things with Jaebum at the end. a gray area. he had been violent and done things he can never take back while he was taken over by his other personality. he had suffered memory loss and didn't even remember doing these things. now, would it have been "just" if Chanmi shot him to avenge her brother? would it still count as retribution if he cannot even take responsibility for the things he doesn't remember doing?

the show posed a lot of important questions regarding violence: is it okay to use violence with violent people? are some crimes worse than others? is it okay to hurt people if they hurt others unintentionally? what role does intent actually play in how we respond to violence? can you still be held responsible for the things you did when you didn't intend to do them? is it okay to enact violence in the name of revenge? who gets to decide what others deserve? to what level? with these questions posed and these themes explored, the show portrayed high schoolers using violence because the justice system or the law enforcement didn't protect them from violence. in the end, we also saw the students continuing to get justice their own way and enact revenge the way they want as they chose to protect Sooheon and not report anything about what happened.

5) INCORPORATION OF ROMANCE -- from the start, we all knew that the genre of this show wasn't romance so there likely wasn't gonna be any romance in it. however, there was "romance" throughout and i actually loved how they incorporated it into the genre. in kdramas, there seems to be a thing where they try to not mix romance as a genre into non-romance shows. romance is a part of life and it happens naturally. it is okay to include romance in non-romance shows because it doesn't have to be the focus of the show. romance plotlines in non-romance dramas are often badly written & poorly integrated but in Revenge of Others, the romance came naturally and it was built slowly on top of feelings of worry. so much so that, when Chanmi and Sooheon finally held hands at the end and confirmed their feelings for each other, they didn't even have to say "the words." they just knew and it was that. Park Solomon and Shin Yeeun had great chemistry and i thought they complemented each other quite well since Yeeun has a colder vibe while Lomon brings in the warmth.

OVERALL -- i really enjoyed watching this show over the weeks. i thought the finale was okay even though it was not completely satisfactory for me. i thought it was an interesting twist that Jaebum was the murderer and he was actually responsible for all the bad “acts” (e.g., the murders) yet Osung was still the actual villain. nevertheless, although an interesting twist, i don’t think Jaebum’s personality disorder was a very well-constructed storyline and that is why the finale was a bit underwhelming. the thing is, they wanted to keep Jaebum on the sidelines throughout the show so the viewers didn’t immediately doubt him but his storyline requires much deeper exploration. dissociative personality disorder (DID) is often caused by trauma. how did he develop it? when exactly? of course, the clues as to him having two personalities were given often, but it wasn't very well-explored in its entirety. in the end, it just seemed like they didn't want a basic murderer reveal. they wanted it to be unique, like, yeah, it was Jaebum but actually.. it was his other personality.

now, it is important to remember that this show relied heavily on narrative manipulation to keep the mystery theme going. a lot of the plotlines actually seemed to only make sense based on whether it was convenient for the plot or not. nevertheless, this was undoubtedly one of the best shows of the year with a great look and directing, incredible performances, and interesting themes.

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best way i can explain it: the feeling of euphoria you would only be able to obtain from hard drugs

"I guess love is more important to her than ideology or principles."
"Of course, love is more important than ideology or principles. Whether you're a man or a woman, that's the truth of life."

writing this review after about 2 hours of finishing the last episode of Snowdrop because i haven't been able to stop sobbing (lol). i feel like the quote i added above is a pretty good summary of the whole show. love: it's the human condition. it's not something that is necessarily in our control. you can try to make soldiers out of children, you can train them not to form bonds with each other, you can sever their familial ties, but love is the human condition and you can never really put an end to all the parts of us that want to love. even when you haven't loved anything before, even when you think you can't, even when you are not supposed to; you are still human and you want to love. every cell in your body responds to love. in the end, you do everything for love.

this show was a masterpiece. i consume a lot of media and yet, this was the best thing that i watched in years. it was perfect, so perfect to me. i loved it so much that i wanted to watch all the episodes at once, but i loved it so much that i wanted to savor it and never reach the end. every episode was so full of tension that i was always at the edge of my seat, not knowing what to expect. i was happy, i was nervous, i was excited all the time. so much so that, i'm pretty sure i will be chasing this high for a long time to no avail. the cinematography, the sound design, the lighting, the scene composition, the story, the dialogue; everything was so well-done. every detail was thought about. you could see the amount of effort that went into every aspect of this show. i was happy and sad the whole time i was watching it; happy because it crossed paths with me and now i get to see it but sad because it would eventually come to an end and leave me emptier than ever. it was unreal. it was such an experience.

RE: CONTROVERSY -- when this show first came out, i was privy to the controversy surrounding it online but i didn't partake in the discourse since i wasn't planning on watching the show at the time. i want to say that, knowing what the controversy was about, i do believe Korean people were rightfully mad at what seemed to be a distortion of history in the first few episodes. in the first few episodes, we saw the ANSP, which was the anti-communism unit working for the South Korean dictatorship at the time, through the character Gang Mu, who was presented as the good guy. while it, later on, becomes clear that the show was trying to show Gang Mu as a good guy in a corrupt organization, this was not immediately clear nor is it historically accurate; therefore, it is expected that people reacted the way they did. as many Koreans addressed, the ANSP were ruthless in their treatment of student protestors who were tortured and killed under the guise of anti-communism when they were in fact fighting for democracy to be established in South Korea. someone pointed out that some of the people who were framed as being communists and tortured by the ANSP are still alive as this is recent history, which makes this whole thing a lot more disrespectful and controversial. also, it needs to be acknowledged that you cannot just make your show take place during the democratization movement, involve the actual organizations and other parties from this period, and add in a "this is all fictional" text to your episodes to avoid the criticism. because that just simply is not how this works when you use actual names and actual historical events, even though the show does not address the movement or the events of this period in detail. as we also know, the truths about the ANSP are depicted in explicit detail as the show goes on, especially the torture, the framing, and the suppression of free speech, as well as the manipulation through media channels. nevertheless, i do feel that the initial backlash was justified; however, the show also doesn't really delve deeply into any political event and it is more focused on the romance that blooms in an unexpected circumstance, as well as the juxtaposition of the human condition and ideologies/revolutionary efforts.

ANTI-COMMUNISM -- one thing that confused me prior to watching the show was how it seemed like both leftists and people who hate leftists were mad at the show for the ways they portrayed certain things. now, we know that South Korean dramas are riddled with anti-communist propaganda and this is almost a given at this point. so, i was really interested to see how, while Snowdrop also had anti-communist propaganda all around, especially in the last episode, they were surprisingly honest about it. they showed how the police force, the ANSP, and the politicians were only there to enact the orders of the state and not to protect the citizens. we saw how free speech and people's right to information through media was controlled and manipulated by these people under the dictatorship. we saw how these parties spread and enforced anti-communism to further divide the South and the North and how the propaganda started as early as childhood (e.g., one of the characters mentioned they won an award as a kid for depicting a scary North Korean spy in a drawing.). i remember reading a statement by JTBC after the backlash and they mentioned how they tried to take a neutral approach to the events depicted and i do partly agree. but i guess that's what some people were mad at since i also saw people complain about the main lead being a communist.

DESIRABILITY -- on that note, with kdramas comes desirability discourse. it was interesting how they even addressed this in the show. when they were going to release the pictures of the North Korean spies, they complained about Soo Hoo being too pretty to be a believable "villain." they also often times mentioned drawing the spies uglier or crasser than they were to push this bad person = bad looks idea. it was also done to make South Koreans see their Northern counterparts as these vile monsters who are inhuman or just very different from them. as a result, it goes without saying that the desirability discourse applies to the show itself as well, where pretty much every character, "good" or "bad,' was conventionally-attractive. i also recently came across a video explaining how this is apparently embedded in Korean culture where they believe your inside is reflected on the outside, so there is a lot of value put into one's appearance and your character will be judged by your appearance, which is the most extreme form of beauty standard i have ever seen, especially when considering a lot of these standards are full of biases and are white-centric.

SOO HO & YOUNG RO'S ROMANCE -- this show had one of the best romance storylines i have ever seen with the way they shot the couple, the way they wrote the couple, and the way the actors acted out their roles. Jung Hae In is an incredible actor whose good looks was honestly distracting throughout the whole show, but i also thought Ji Soo did amazing and I could really see her passion for acting. this romance storyline is a great example of why i prefer "romantic" stories over romance-focused dramas because, for example, in this show, it's really not about the skinship. it’s how their eyes lingered on each other’s faces every time they got a chance to look at one another. it’s how Soo Ho's eyes always seemed to find her even in a room full of people, in the middle of all the chaos. it's how even if i didn't see it, i could feel both Soo Ho and Young Ro immediately think of and look for each other whenever they felt they were in danger. it was poetic. it was romantic. it was layered and so, so deep. their love was young, tender, and full of guilt. his helplessness, and her representing light and hope. her guilt, and him representing righteousness and sacrifice. there was a lot of chemistry between the actors but this show was also a great example of how good filmmaking and writing can elevate a romance story and intensify a couple's chemistry levels. the writing, the way they played with the lighting during their scenes, the way the director focused on their eyes: these things intensified the whole experience for me. i specifically want to make a note of how the director's focus on eyes in speaking scenes was really a great choice. i always value eye acting over anything else and that's clearly where we hold the most emotion. focusing on the actor's eyes only as they said their lines.. they didn't have to write disappointment, i saw it in their eyes. they didn't have to write the guilt, the butterflies in the stomach, the fear.. we saw it all in their eyes in these shots.

THE ENDING -- first of all, it was such a unique experience to watch all of this unfold in 16 episodes where only about 2 weeks had passed in the show. they gave us 2 full weeks of these characters' lives and it was everything. now, from the start, i knew that Soo Ho and Young Ro would not have a "happy" ending. i also knew that he would likely not survive the show. i knew they would kill him in front of me in a scene but i didn't expect to witness soldiers emptying their clips on his back as Young Ro watched. yeah, that was devastating, for lack of a better word. Soo Ho came back to die. he knew he was going to die. i knew he was going to die. we were both okay with it. because all this time, i was thinking; say he doesn't die and then what? there is no way they could have actually been together. forget about being together, if he was to get hurt, they wouldn't even treat him at the hospital and let her stay by his side. he was far from home, in a land that was foreign to him, fighting for the people that had forsaken him long ago. they had already given up on him. in fact, he had no business falling in love and he knew it too. but as i said, it's the human condition and Soo Ho's story was the saddest one next to Young Ro, who lost everything in the span of 2 weeks. she had already lost her mother; then, she lost her beloved brother in such a horrid way. she lost her respect for her father and she lost all of her friends. then, she lost her first love. the man who protected her even when she didn't know it. the man who loved her to death. and Soo Ho was doomed from the start. he had so much love to give but no way to communicate it. he cared a lot but had no way to rationalize it. he did everything to save everyone and it was just heartbreaking to see that all of his efforts to take back the things he has done were in vain. his comrades that he was responsible for died. he himself died never being able to step foot in his homeland again. he didn't get to hold his sister's baby. he didn't get to hold her either. he didn't get to drink with his comrades. he didn't get to become a musician and sing at a cafe to his loved ones. he didn't get to love, let alone grow old with the people he loved. what did he die for? what would he have lived for? it was just sad.

OVERALL -- okay, the more that i write, the closer i'm getting to breaking down again lol. overall, this was a very special project and i hope everyone involved in it knows they created something amazing that i know will be appreciated even after so long. this show had so many memorable and layered characters with their own, interesting storylines. Ms. Pi was such a prominent and memorable character and the actor gave amazing performances over and over again. comrade Joo was another character that was interesting; that scene where the cafeteria lady wanted to feed him because she thought he was her son almost broke me. he was just a kid. there is a lot more to say and i probably have so much more to say as well but i guess this is it for now.

basically, if your Snowdrop experience was not like the feeling of euphoria you would only be able to obtain from hard drugs, then i am so sorry lol. because that is exactly how i would describe it. every. damn. episode. EUPHORIA.

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incredibly frustrating with the most illogical premise. this screenwriter should put the pen down.

i was really enjoying this show at the start (8/10) but the screenwriter was adamant on ruining their own work.. so they did, and this show had one of the worst lakorn endings i have ever witnessed. overall, this show is not necessarily as dramatic or complex as other lakorns yet it manages to be just as infuriating!

first of all, the original premise of this show is just absolutely deranged and cruel. you have a happy couple (Kim & Mook) about to get married. Kim's sister gets murdered by Mook's brother. Kim suspects him based on partial evidence but Mook defends her brother, as most people would. Mook helps her brother get acquitted and Kim secretly resents her for it but doesn’t say anything. THEN, fucking Kim lets Mook, his fiancée, think that things are cool between them after his sister died and he blamed Mook's brother, when he actually goes and asks Pak, his girl best friend who previously caused jealousy fights between the couple, to replace Mook in THEIR wedding. he says not to tell anyone too. lol. so, he makes up an elaborate plan to deeply hurt, traumatize, and humiliate his fiancée by showing up with and marrying someone else at THEIR wedding, while behaving like there aren’t any problems between them until the wedding day so Mook doesn’t figure out his plan JUST BECAUSE she didn’t believe her brother was capable of murder.

this plot is so unnecessarily cruel and devoid of logic that it drove me crazy. because, you know, even in lakorns like Kleun Cheewit, which is also based on revenge, the plot makes at least a certain amount of sense. it made sense that Sathit hated Tiw because she had actually killed his fiancee and the premise of that show was to slowly reveal the truth about the accident with the hate turning into love. what's Kim's excuse? lol. he doesn't have one because Mook didn't actually do anything to him. she just didn't immediately believe him when he blamed HER BROTHER for a MURDER. there's no logical explanation for what he did and even the "it's just a lakorn" excuse doesn't save this show because why the fuck would you do that. how is that not an INSANE thing to even think of doing. the part that i can't get over is actually the planning. like, he never said anything to Mook about how he actually felt about her siding with her brother. he PLOTTED. he set a TRAP. he really wanted to hurt her. someone who loves you would not do that to you. so, of course, after that point, it just becomes almost impossible to believe he ever had genuine feelings for this girl because it would be an insult to call that love.

people called Mook all kinds of names for siding with her brother but i think that's just the fans getting too caught up in the fact that what they're watching is a work of fiction that they forget it's mirroring real life! who would believe their sibling is capable of murdering their significant other, especially when there is no proper evidence to make them think so? who would not fight these allegations when your sibling tells you they did not do it? people act like she was ever in the wrong when she was not. on the other hand, Kim has the right to get mad because he has acquired more evidence that is easy for him to believe in but not for Mook. HOWEVER, what happened to, “let’s break up”? what happened to, “i can’t be with you because i feel guilty towards my dead sister”? why not a simple, “i loved you but you didn’t choose to side with me”? if this was a dealbreaker for Kim that he just couldn't be with Mook as she sided with her brother, THEN WHY NOT JUST BREAK UP WITH HER. you had to deceive and humiliate her, open wounds that you can’t heal, and create memories that you can’t take back? how is any part of that "love"? the thing with love is, it would bring compassion. if he was really that mad at Mook for not seeing what he thought of as the truth, he would at least let her go in case he hurt her with his anger. but instead, he did something so much more despicable.

i actually really liked Mook in the beginning and appreciated her stance and resilience, until, of course, her character was ruined. she never let Kim see how devastated she was by what he did to her and how humiliating and soul-breaking the whole experience was. she stood her ground and didn't yield to him. she didn't give him the satisfaction of seeing her cry or lose sleep over him. i mean, he knew the impact of what he did, but Mook had self-respect is what i'm saying.

actually, the whole time they were laying out this stupid premise, i knew that they would make Mook feel guilty about "not believing" Kim at first when her reaction and stance is THE normal. i knew they would make it this whole thing where Mook would go, "oh, you were right. i'm sorry," when it was never about Kim anyways. this entire show, Kim acts like a victim as if he just wanted to have a good life with Mook but she ruined it by not siding with him when it was HIM who ruined whatever they had with Mook. the show was also adamant about positioning him as the victim somehow when the only victim was really Mook, who was made to be too stupid towards the end for me to even continue caring. furthermore, throughout the whole show, Kim puts Mook in a mistress position since Mook thinks Kim's marriage with Pak is legitimate when it's just for show. he keeps pursuing her, to which she falls for because, duh, they were so in love that they were going to get married just a while ago. BUT there is an even crazier attempt to make Kim seem like a victim in the show. HE GOES BLIND! lol. they make him go blind so he can receive sympathy from everyone he has wronged without it being weird. literally, he was so wrong yet they made Mook take care of him and receive his lashings about the gun, asking for forgiveness, when it was ALL HIM. he was in the wrong, not her.

and don't even get me started on the dumb pregnancy plotlines. i couldn't believe that Mook actually became easygoing with Kim after he found out about the baby. a baby doesn't fix anything. how embarrassing and humiliating for Mook it was for her to go live with her ex-fiancee and his new pregnant wife lmao. the screenwriter of this show has gotta be a man because no woman would put up or come up with this shit. this plotline was just so disgusting. by the end, you'd think that they'd focus on resolving things and healing their wounds, and developing the relationship between the main couple into a beautiful end but instead, we got to witness Kim forming a harem when he decided to live with the two women pregnant by him lol how humiliating.

throughout the whole show, i was waiting for Kim's apology to Mook about what he did at the wedding. they brushed it off when that was the biggest disrespect and cruelty anyone could inflict on someone. episode 7, 8, 9.. no apology. episode 13, 14.. just apologize. episode 19.. episode 21.. HE DOESN'T EVEN APOLOGIZE lmao. do you know when we get an apology? when he DARES to meet Mook at the altar again in the last 10 minutes of the finale to essentially marry her this time. lol, what a joke. he just says sorry like he bumped into her accidentally. boy, how about getting on your knees and asking for forgiveness for the rest of your fucking life lmao. also, NOT ONLY did she not get an apology throughout the show, but they also had her say that she wasn't mat ad his revenge anymore and that she understood it. read this again: THEY MADE HER SAY SHE UNDERSTOOD WHY HE DID WHAT HE DID.

and Pak.. i've never seen a show try to redeem a villain while not having them do anything to atone for their sins. she literally was the cause of every drama and every evil act in this show yet she got to be the victim and even got "redeemed" at the end of the show. she tried to get Mook raped, murdered, and set up many many times yet she really won everything in the end, it's crazy! lol. it was so annoying all throughout how nothing Pak did seemed to be visible. like, people found out about all the awful things she did yet nothing happened, and nobody did anything. i think even the screenwriter forgot towards the end because they made it seem like Pak never knew Thada was a murderer when she said it herself a couple of episodes ago lol. it was also insane how they all acted like Pak was just a victim of her overbearing feelings for Kim, which, it's "love" so it must be okay. it was so stupid that when we should have been watching the main couple's healing story, all we got in the last 7-10 episodes was Pak, Pak, Pak.

the plot was too draggy. nothing got resolved until the very end, and even then, they didn't resolve things but covered them up. the "resolution" was rushed and badly written. the whole show, after the introduction of the premise, has been stagnating and nothing really happens during the middle parts. it's like all the episodes after the first few were filler yet the story still needs more episodes to be complete because they simply never explored it and developed it properly. like, by the end, after the pregnancy plotlines started, there was no love or romance left in the show. no touches, no kisses, no lingering looks, no passion between the main couple. they just shared scenes with other people where they were both feeling sorry for each other or for other people.

OVERALL:

they're so wrong for making the villain into a victim and never acknowledging the actual victim.
they're so wrong for making the victim sympathize with the villain just for their unnecessary and unjustified redemption arc.
they're so wrong for never giving the victim any kind of apology or attempts at reconciliation from Kim who has hurt her relentlessly and needlessly for no good reason.
they're so wrong for letting the villain be redeemed with no work done to right their wrongs and making her seem like the good guy at the end as if she was sacrificing something (i.e., giving Kim "back").

in the end, this show was disappointing and felt like a waste of time. i only continued to watch, like, the last 10ish episodes because i wanted to see if Kim would actually ever apologize. this show was also the kind of stupid that just makes you mad because your intelligence is insulted. Kim was disappointing and he wasn't a good man AND his actions weren't justified. Mook was resilient and i wish she stayed that way instead of the screenwriter making her stupid and naive just to give Pak a redemption arc.

the only good things about the show were the main actors. loved them. other than them, i loved Fon and the lawyer as a couple. Fon was also the only person who spoke %100 the truth throughout the whole show yet they made it seem like she was too crazy for saying all that true stuff. i also loved Mona's actor. loved seeing a Black Thai woman involved in a lakorn.

so, basically, this screenwriter should never write again.. put the pen down.

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UNSATISFYING and repetitive with so much unexplored potential

"unsatisfying" is the most appropriate adjective to describe this show. it honestly feels like the writer came up with the main points of the plot and thought the rest would fall into place without actually figuring out the details. i was initially interested in the premise of this show. you know, childhood friends, enemies-to-lovers, second-chance romance, cohabitation, etc. usually, shared childhood (plus childhood romance plotline) adds depth to a couple's story. but for the writer of this show, that history remains an untapped resource. from the flashbacks we got, it seemed like Lan actually might have cared for Mook as a teen as well. like, the point was supposed to be that he always cared about her but he wasn't aware of his feelings. they explored none of this properly. also, if you're giving your characters some history, you need to remember that they would be carrying said history with them at every point in their life. for instance, Mook was often teased about her appearance by Lan as a kid and she felt unloved and rejected. that doesn't go away once you grow up and become desirable. the adult Mook didn't show any signs of carrying that insecurity around or any sign of having resolved it.

also, more than anything, what was missing from this show was the RIGHT words. it honestly felt like the writer came up with an interesting story yet they had no idea how to properly explore it in WORDS. i don't care how ridiculous the reasoning for some things was. its a lakorn, we get it. but there is really no explanation for some things. like, first, Lan really seemed to just hate Mook and it was clear that ever since he was a kid, he saw Mook as something that was forced onto him by his parents, which was true. he hated her. she also claimed she hated him because she felt hurt by how harshly he rejected her in the past. but, pretty much throughout the whole show, there was no emotional development between the main couple. until the last few episodes, it was all teasing and bickering and fighting. i mean, the narrative structure of the show was so so bad. it felt like the writer didn't know they'd only be getting 15 episodes to tell their story. Lan just kept saying he hated her in every scene, even when we should've started to get some development. at that point, we should've gotten some scenes indicating that his feelings might have changed. or that he actually feels a certain way but isn't aware of it. something, you know? and even though they portrayed Mook as this strong female lead (which she was in many aspects), she was made miserable and pathetic by Lan because she had to "act" like she willingly married Lan. like, at some point, she should have let go of him. staying even when she was gaining nothing and he was still not into her made her look miserable and pathetic. even the house excuse wasn't enough to cover up her pathetic attempts at seeking love from a man who just did not want to give it to her.

i don't know, they just did such a bad job with Lan's character. i actually loved the actor and his performance. one of the main reasons i continued watching the show was because i saw pieces of Thyme from F4 Thailand in Lan. some of his mannerisms and his grumpy attitude reminded me of him. but his hatred was too unwavering for me to be able to imagine love between the main couple. they also tried to do the, oh, he's actually still in love with his first love thing when we had like 5 episodes left, which is just insane to me. so, basically, we only had lustful, hateful, and bickering scenes between the main couple with no emotional development, the main lead was possibly in love with his first love, he even insulted the main female lead at her dad's funeral, and he still went to his first love even after having a moment with Mook. he was actually in bed with her when Mook was out there getting attacked (lol), and we were supposed to root for him? or be satisfied with that finale? it was also so ridiculous how whenever Lan would get close to realizing his feelings for Mook, they would come up with a new excuse as to why he wouldn't confess. very very unoriginal and uninteresting.

i also hated how cowardly Lan was and how his feelings for Mook were obviously never strong enough for him to not care about anything or anyone and just be with Mook. but more so, i HATED how Mook constantly risked her life, saving Lan, only for him to accuse her further every time. if he was a proper man, one time would have been enough to stop him in his tracks and think deeply about why this woman would risk her life to save him. one time should have been enough. lol, but what's even worse is that it actually takes Mook getting STABBED for Lan for his feelings to finally be strong enough for him to want to verbalize them. HAHA.

the pool scene where Mook told Lan that he always looked at her with hatred and contempt but he would sometimes look at her with worry was the closest we ever got to exploring ANYTHING meaningful in this show. these were the scenes that got me excited and made me think the show would be more profound and layered. other than that, i think the main couple actually had pretty good chemistry, which was totally wasted until the last 2-3 episodes. leaving the "cute" moments of the main couple until the very end is insane by the way. they really gave us nothing for a good 12 episodes and then they were being civil and cute and hot at the very end. as i said, so much wasted potential.

anyways, i skipped all the scenes that weren't related to the main couple because they are often irrelevant and boring. even though i did this, i still want to say that Petch was incredibly annoying and i hate how they made her, a MINOR, a couple with the grown ass second male lead. i also don't like how the show was much more rom-com in the beginning and then it turned into a thriller drama for the last few episodes. although i liked Lan way more when was being more serious and thoughtful. i think that's it.

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decent story that is made poignant and unique through storytelling & poetic directing

very enjoyable, slice-of-life drama with a decent story. i randomly came across this on Viki and wanted to give it a chance. i think the best part of this drama is the directing. i loved the scene compositions which almost all the time added to the plot more than the actual dialogue. i loved how the composition in certain scenes created chemistry between the characters. for example, there were scenes where Kanata and Misaki were not even in the same room, yet the way the specific scene was set up was enough to cultivate chemistry on the screen.

i loved the acting performances as well but one thing that was especially notable was the eye-acting. there were a lot of scenes where it was just the character staring at another character and they were all so impactful at making the viewer feel things. i think eye-acting plays a very important part in east-Asian dramas because they aren't always heavily reliant on dialogue. this was another thing that i loved. for example, Kanata was pretty much fully silent in the episode where he found out he was adopted yet he had a lot of scenes in the episode where his presence was heavily felt. Yamazaki Kento was able to translate that sense of confusion and hurt very well.

i also loved the way they used music in this drama. it was used sparingly and often times, i loved the dialogue scenes with no music in the background even more. more so, i very much enjoyed how this drama made room to have long scenes that were just made up of monologues with more than one person in the scene and no music in the background. something about it felt incredibly authentic to me. most dramas feel formulaic while this was more.. poetic? with that being said, i didn't necessarily care for the adoption storyline or the restaurant transfer but clearly, neither did the writers/producers because they didn't handle those topics as if they were supposed to be big plotlines. they only handled the impact these plotlines had on the characters and their relationships. it was always about their changing relationship dynamics and not the actual threat of them losing the restaurant or whatever. those plotlines weren't anywhere near unique but the way they handled them by focusing on character relationships was very unique and well done. also, i can't help it, i just like a good enemies-to-lovers storyline lol (even with the love triangle!!).

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incredible payoff with lots of ANGST, had great writing yet an underwhelming resolution

tropes: #slowburn #enemiestolovers #revengeromance #ANGST #impossiblelove #misunderstanding

this was definitely the best Thai lakorn i have ever seen -- admittedly, i haven't seen that many. it seemed to be less dramatic (although there was still a lot of drama, of course) compared to the usual lakorn. i would even say it was much more realistic at times. however, the episodes are entirely way too long and full of filler. that is why i mostly skipped everything other than the main couple's scenes. and that's mostly why i gave this an 8/10. if it was shorter with a higher budget and a better resolution of the conflict at the end, the score might've been much higher.

i love the revenge/romance genre but this plot was something else. as someone who enjoys the slow burn, impossible love, enemies-to-lovers, angst, etc. tropes, this was giving all of that and more. i also wanna add that this is the kind of drama I'm looking for when i say enemies-to-lovers, you know. it doesn't get any better than this.

this was incredibly angsty. when i read the synopsis, i knew that it would be a slow burn but those first 5-6 episodes almost killed me lol. i was just like, how is this gonna work.. no matter the circumstances, which did matter but you know, she did cause his fiancee to die. and the hatred portrayed was so raw that i was just like, how are they gonna turn this around? break the ice? how could he ever love her? but it was actually so well done. it was slow but the payoff was so worth it. my favorite scenes were the ones where they both acted with so much affection to each other without admitting to their feelings. i also loved that they didn't undermine Sathit's relationship with Tiw just to make it easier for the main couple to be developed. no, they really showed us that he was deeply in love with his fiancee that died and that's why the main couple's chemistry was so good and full of angst.

it was just very realistic and the relationship of the main couple developed very organically. on that note, i loved the writing of their dialogues. it was very strong and fulfilling. both main leads did an amazing job with their performances but especially the female lead. i think she just might be my favorite female character in all Thai dramas i've seen so far. she was just so strong and had a lot of self-respect. she never let herself be disrespected and humiliated. she always knew what to say in response to insults. she was just way too iconic. these are all the characteristics that are often missing from the main female lead characters in Thai dramas. written by a woman? yes ma'am.

the issue of consent in Thai lakorns isn't something new but seeing them acknowledge an act that happened nonconsensually between the main couple at the end showed me that the issue isn't that there is a lack of understanding around consent (culturally and among lakorn writers) but it's actually that there is a lack of respect for it. to be frank, they just don't care is what it is. i would love to say this has gotten better in the newer lakorns but that does not seem to be the case (cough cough Nabi, My Stepdarling).

finally, i didn't like the last two episodes very much. i thought the resolution was underwhelming and they dragged the drama between the main couple for way too long. they literally only gave us like 30-minutes of cute scenes of them as a couple when we needed a few episodes at least because they were just too cute! anyways, i loved this so much.

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a story that explores good & evil & presents both sides objectively w/o playing the devil's advocate

tropes: #secondchance #sharedtrauma #softmalelead #angst (short-lived) #firstlove #norandombreakup #healing #trauma #codependence #violence #goodandevil

ah, what a journey. this show was really good and emotional with a solid story. i thought the show represented the side of the victims, as well as the mentality of the abuser(s) very well. the show itself, while showcasing both of these perspectives, didn't shy away from endorsing the victims' side, as well as making a point out of the offenders' logical fallacies.

Namu and Nakwon had such a great love. the kind where they could never even look at anyone else. it's so interesting because, in this story where the FL's parents are murdered by the ML's father, the FL never once blames the ML. Nakwon didn't even blame him on the day that it happened. she had just watched her parents die and went through the most traumatic event anyone can experience, yet she worried about letting Namu know that it wasn't his fault. i just felt like they loved each other so deeply. i think it might've been the innocence that falling in love as children brings to a relationship or the fact that they could never heal all those years that they were apart that made their love so great.

if i had to pinpoint the main focus of this drama, i would say that this is a story about healing. more than any of the scenes, i found the last scene where Namu and Nakwon saw their 16 yo selves and hugged them the most emotionally devastating. it was an amazing portrayal of 'healing your inner child.'

now, this is definitely a heavy show that puts the viewer through a lot of different emotions. some scenes can be quite triggering. there are depictions of murder, more specifically femicides committed by a man who targeted women who were weaker than him to enact violence. there are themes of trauma and depictions of the impact trauma can have on people, such as nightmares, or different tendencies. there's death and blood shown, of course. so beware of those themes.

all of these actors gave the performances of a lifetime on this show, by the way. the leads. the reporters, the brother, the mom, the dad. everyone acted their ass off and brought this story to reality. in the beginning, i saw so much of a resemblance between the young Namu and Nakwon and their older versions that I truly believed in their story. i felt like i could see their young selves every time i looked at them. the continuity was amazing. i also loved how Namu just became that little 16 yo kid every time he was with Nakwon and looking into her eyes. i felt like that was such a great representation of a traumatized kid who never got to grow up and heal. a lot of that was Jang Ki Yong i think.

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