3
2
Salatheel
Stuck in traffic on a very long winded Road Home
My education in Chinese dramas continues apace with this romantic offering. This is 100% about relationship; every sigh, every tear, every regret, every breath, every tender touch, every long lingering look (and there are a glut of them to the point of nausea) is lovingly laid out for you. So if you’re a romance junkie, this one’s totally for you. And the leads make a very creditable job of the chemistry even though the script circumnavigated the globe rather than let them get skin on skin.
Quite how they managed to act this well amidst the shambling, third rate budget production going on around them is to their credit, because once it strays into any other territory it’s like sailing through lumpy porridge. I recommend just scooting through and only watching the scenes between the leads in the first half, then skip to the end. You won’t miss anything and then the drama might seem quite good and you’ll be less likely to fall asleep at the wheel.
The ML works as a bomb disposal expert (for once the job matched the personality) however, there’s a laughable lack of procedure around it. Although, it does do a good job of highlighting the stress to the family of people involved in such dangerous work. The FL is cast in the stay-cheerful-be-long-suffering-self-sacrifice-to-the-end part: “I am willing to donate half my husband for the country”. ’Nuff said. But at least she has a professional job and a life of her own. As with most Chinese stuff, it’s got an education emphasis, complete with nifty tips and tricks. This one centres on how to be grown ups and have a long-distance relationship.
The plot has the feel of the writer gets up in the morning and thinks, as they chomp their toast and gulp their coffee, okay I need to go shopping, get the kids to basketball, ring my mother, renew the car insurance, organise a Creatively Exhausted Writers support group meeting and, oh, script the next episode. Hmmm, not got a lot of time to be imaginative today so they can just chat aimlessly for half an hour, then I’ll use that idea I had lying around from the last drama I wrote.
The problem being, they think that every morning so there’s not a lot of forward planning going on with the result that there is very little flow or cohesion, just a random sequence of scenes. Some of the playing out of crises is — well—embarrassing. Obviously where research and experience are absent, fantasy has a ball. Actually there’s very little plot at all and it could all be over and done with in six episodes including plumbing some depth. The whole thing is a perfect definition for “filler episodes”.
Okay you have to have a little bit of sympathy when they obviously had the brief to talk up some barren desert and sell it like it’s prime Manhattan real estate. Not sure what Mandarin word they actually used, but “pretty” is not what springs to mind. Don’t get me wrong here, I genuinely love the outback, but my descriptive words and feelings might sound more like awe inspiring, powerful, unlimited and silent. And I wouldn’t go out there in a skirt and high heels.
As for the dialogue; banal and directionless come to mind with occasional sparks of insight between the leads, as though someone on the writing team had some time to think creatively that day. And the pacing? It’s a very, very long road home and expect to crawl along like you’re stuck in traffic.
There’s not a great deal of understanding about how to build tension using cinematography, editing and soundtrack. Oh, just do normal tracking shots with some random music over the top, then a couple of close-ups—that’ll work. Or continuing to film in an urban location where the wind was so hard into the microphone it almost drowned out the dialogue. At times the editing is really bad, with lots of scenes rammed together like shish kebab on a skewer. Even on HD streaming some of it looked out of focus and badly lit.
On a more serious note, there’s a storyline about a kid being educated away from home, who gets shunted around like a pass the parcel. Even when he was at home, he spent long periods on his own whilst his father worked away. Then we find out that his new main carer has 200 days of business trips a year. I found it profoundly sad and not least because the writing team thought that was a situation they didn’t really need to investigate much.
What my rating means: 4+ I forced myself to go through to the end of it, but only because I was committed to writing the review. It annoyed the hell out of me. Actively avoid.
Quite how they managed to act this well amidst the shambling, third rate budget production going on around them is to their credit, because once it strays into any other territory it’s like sailing through lumpy porridge. I recommend just scooting through and only watching the scenes between the leads in the first half, then skip to the end. You won’t miss anything and then the drama might seem quite good and you’ll be less likely to fall asleep at the wheel.
The ML works as a bomb disposal expert (for once the job matched the personality) however, there’s a laughable lack of procedure around it. Although, it does do a good job of highlighting the stress to the family of people involved in such dangerous work. The FL is cast in the stay-cheerful-be-long-suffering-self-sacrifice-to-the-end part: “I am willing to donate half my husband for the country”. ’Nuff said. But at least she has a professional job and a life of her own. As with most Chinese stuff, it’s got an education emphasis, complete with nifty tips and tricks. This one centres on how to be grown ups and have a long-distance relationship.
The plot has the feel of the writer gets up in the morning and thinks, as they chomp their toast and gulp their coffee, okay I need to go shopping, get the kids to basketball, ring my mother, renew the car insurance, organise a Creatively Exhausted Writers support group meeting and, oh, script the next episode. Hmmm, not got a lot of time to be imaginative today so they can just chat aimlessly for half an hour, then I’ll use that idea I had lying around from the last drama I wrote.
The problem being, they think that every morning so there’s not a lot of forward planning going on with the result that there is very little flow or cohesion, just a random sequence of scenes. Some of the playing out of crises is — well—embarrassing. Obviously where research and experience are absent, fantasy has a ball. Actually there’s very little plot at all and it could all be over and done with in six episodes including plumbing some depth. The whole thing is a perfect definition for “filler episodes”.
Okay you have to have a little bit of sympathy when they obviously had the brief to talk up some barren desert and sell it like it’s prime Manhattan real estate. Not sure what Mandarin word they actually used, but “pretty” is not what springs to mind. Don’t get me wrong here, I genuinely love the outback, but my descriptive words and feelings might sound more like awe inspiring, powerful, unlimited and silent. And I wouldn’t go out there in a skirt and high heels.
As for the dialogue; banal and directionless come to mind with occasional sparks of insight between the leads, as though someone on the writing team had some time to think creatively that day. And the pacing? It’s a very, very long road home and expect to crawl along like you’re stuck in traffic.
There’s not a great deal of understanding about how to build tension using cinematography, editing and soundtrack. Oh, just do normal tracking shots with some random music over the top, then a couple of close-ups—that’ll work. Or continuing to film in an urban location where the wind was so hard into the microphone it almost drowned out the dialogue. At times the editing is really bad, with lots of scenes rammed together like shish kebab on a skewer. Even on HD streaming some of it looked out of focus and badly lit.
On a more serious note, there’s a storyline about a kid being educated away from home, who gets shunted around like a pass the parcel. Even when he was at home, he spent long periods on his own whilst his father worked away. Then we find out that his new main carer has 200 days of business trips a year. I found it profoundly sad and not least because the writing team thought that was a situation they didn’t really need to investigate much.
What my rating means: 4+ I forced myself to go through to the end of it, but only because I was committed to writing the review. It annoyed the hell out of me. Actively avoid.
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